I'm In Love

Yep

I'm in L.O.V.E.

...with my readers...

I don't know to how express the appreciation for everyone that tweeted up, shouted out and shared with their social media groups about the recent contest.  But I am humbled, amazed, and truly in love with all of you readers out there - that stop by, say hi, and kick a tire or two.... and I want to thank you for your support on my blog.

Blogging has been my outlet for writing (which I love to do), my place to vent, and time to share with the whole wide world of a web about my journey.  Here I have found great companionship from those who are also traveling this road of single mom life and others who just want to share as fellow moms or friends... interested in keeping up with my story.  I have been able to talk about dating again with stories that are sometimes fun/funny (at least I think so) or sometimes sad.  My readers have seen the struggles that come with getting back out there after divorce but also heard about the "interesting" people that I have met through that process.

Recently I  have even been approached to do some reviews and giveaways - and that has been so awesome - to be able to give back to my readers and in turn take blogging up to the next level.  I don't make a feasible income from the site... (yeah I still work a day job), but if I can give a few things away from sponsors now and then.... that makes it worthwhile for me - and I hope for you too!!!  Oh and by the way, very soon I will be putting together another bag of goodies from SingleEdition.com.  So stay tuned to hear more about how to get that.

As I received more comments along the way, it intrigued me to share even more in keeping it real as I walked this journey.  And now with each 'paced' step I want to continue to stop and smell the roses and in turn give you a glimpse of what is real in my world.

So I hope you will take a minute to read a few more posts, find out about the new man in my life (if you are new here) and then subscribe to the rest.  And don't forget: continue to share with me by leaving your comments.   I truly love hearing from you!

Find yourself... keeping it real.

Technorati Tags: blogging,relationships,reviews,giveaways,contests,dating,single moms dating

Photo Credit:  http://www.ucd.ie/quinn/t4cms/i_love_blogging-787805.jpg

Last day to Enter for the FREE Wii and Wii Fit

Take a minute to check out the Keep Mooo-ving contest guidelines and get your entry in before midnight tonight (Friday, July 31).  I will be announcing the winner next week for the great prizes sponsored by Shamrock Farms.

I have several entries to go through - but I may be missing yours!  Send it on to my email, today.

Find yourself... keeping it real.

dealing with disappointments

If you have went through the big D (and I don't mean Dallas), then you know how it can be a real court battle of fight after fight.  This is especially true when it comes to how much time you get to spend with the children.  Mr. M. had another custody hearing recently and the verdict was in favor of the mother, even though the children's law guardian encouraged  extra days with their father. 

When things don't go your way and you were hoping so hard and praying with all your might, you do - at times - feel like - giving up.  Giving up on the battle and giving up on your faith. 

Why doesn't God look down and just straighten all this out? 

He can, but many times I've witnessed He doesn't do it the way we want or in the timing we want.  It's not that God doesn't care or that we are just a bunch of ants running around and He is up there watching us in our own frivolous nature.  It's just that this is par for the course when it comes to divorce.  It can get ugly and it is full of disappointments. Unless the mother is a drug dealing addict drunk on the street corner every night, most judges are not going to pull kids away from time with their moms even if their dads are upright citizens and great mentors.  I'm not saying this is right - I'm just saying what I have witnessed with other friends dealing with custody battles and again here with Mr. M.

It goes without saying, there will be many times we will feel major disappointment. We will feel like God let us down.  But remember, God isn't doing this to us.  The situation of divorce, in this case, is the culprit... and the other parties (who have a free will) that are being difficult, not God.   In fact, God is the One who brings us peace and serenity, if we let Him.  I've felt it before, have you?

Let me just say I have witnessed personally some divine miracles.  So I know he can intervene.... from healing family situations to healing a disease.  My aunt's marriage was healed and one of my best friends growing up was healed of Muscular Dystrophy; so I believe in miracles.  But not every request is answered the same way.

So how do we deal?

How do we keep our faith intact when we seem to get knocked down or knocked out for the fight... when we don't want to bother getting back up?  We have to keep our faith. 

It's not easy; and sometimes we take one step at a time or just one moment at a time: knowing God is still there, even if we are mad at Him at the moment as a result of the situation.  You will feel the emotions that result from consequences.  Emotions don't mean we are no longer Christians - far from it.  We have to be realistic in our expectations when it comes to our faith.  Remember, we are still human and we do have feelings.  What we do with those feelings is our choice.  And that's where making the right choices come in.  How we choose to go from here in reaction to our disappointment and our emotion of anger... that will be where we steer the course for our faith.  Will we keep praying and believing?  Or will we turn our back on what we have known to be a stronghold, our help in troubling situations?

During these times, it would be nice to see the higher view of this bigger picture of life that is being painted, the one we just cannot see.  Then we might understand why things don't quite work out the way we hoped, or the way we planned.

Bad things happen to good people.  There's no rhyme or reason behind it.  God doesn't just "let" it happen.  It's a part of living in an imperfect world and the consequences of such imperfection.  This is not to suggest that prayer isn't powerful, or that we shouldn't pray.  But when things don't go completely our way, I hope we can refrain, even in the moments of anger and other emotions that run wild, from having bitterness set in and taking over.

God is good all the time, and all the time, God is good.

Find yourself...keeping it real.

Technorati Tags: disappointments,faith,divorce,emotions,human-nature

Photo Credit: http://dogsounds.files.wordpress.com/2009/02/sad20face.jpg

Weddings

Mr. M. and I went to our first wedding together this past weekend.  One of my best friends - her son got married.  (Side note: He married my X's cousin.)  The wedding was absolutely beautiful.  It all turned out as they planned, great weather, no real glitches and it all happened right on the very campus where I work every day.  (It truly is a beautiful campus at the state office where I work.)

I helped serve the two families and the wedding party at the rehearsal dinner Friday night.  I was nervous about seeing my X's extended family, but it went great and everyone was kind.  I spoke at length with the bride's mom at the wedding the next day and it was like we were long lost friends.  I was pleased with how it all went.

But it's not all about me...(even though the last four sentences all began with "I") the wedding overall was so wonderful and the bride and groom were happy and that's what matters.  The mother of the groom was also happy and exhausted following the event.

Being at the wedding got me wondering.... you know... will I ever get married again?  Watching as the bride walks down the aisle and while everyone celebrates this new union, you can't help but think about stuff like that.

No worries, Mr. M. I am not in any hurry.  Seriously, I am enjoying having a relationship - with no pressure for more right now.  I know it takes work to find that place of peace and contentment with "where you are" in life, enjoying it... and not always looking for something you don't have.  Getting into that place... that is success.

But on that note, even though the wedding I attended was great - and it was with a capital G, it wasn't quite as "unique" as this wedding march... check out this you-tube video of "Jill and Kevin's Big Day".

(Now, before you do, don't forget to enter the CONTEST for the Free Wii and Wii Fit.  The last day to enter is getting close!  Friday, July 31 is the deadline. Click this link and enter today.)

And back to weddings, If I ever have another one.....I might want to do something like this.... maybe. (OK, now watch the YouTube video.)

Find yourself... keeping it real.

Technorati Tags: weddings,Jill and Kevin,relationships,contentment,contests,single moms dating

Six Month Anniversary

SIX MONTHS

Should I be sharing some of those sweet nothings between Mr. M. and me right here in the public eye for the whole wide world of a web to see?

Well in keeping it real, why not?

Recently, I asked him, "How long have we been dating now?"

"Six months," he answered.  I knew how long it had been... but it meant a great deal to me that he had kept up with it as well. 

Feel Like Dancing

"You make me feel like dancing" comes to mind sometimes when I think about being with him, while at other times I think, "What am I doing in a serious relationship?  Is this real?" And yes, I still wonder that six months in. 

Here we are: two single parents finding our way in this journey of "trying again" at a sincere relationship.  We have our moments when we get flustered with each other, mostly over being able to communicate something to the other or when a miscommunication occurs in that process.  So I am not going to tell you it's all sweet nothings and dances. 

There are also moments when I get tongue-tied trying to introduce him to people I know.  We go to events together and I just end up with the witty and bright "This is (Mr. M.) and his two boys." (I do say his real name btw.)  But I haven't figured out if I should say, he's my boyfriend, my significant other, my current relationship dude... or what to relay the proper adult dating etiquette.  Any suggestions?  So for now, I just say, "This is (his name here)."  And that way I just let them put 2 and 2 together or let them continue to wonder as we walk away.

But the more time I spend with him, getting to know him; the more I like being around him.  He proves this to me over and over again with his amazing flexibility and calm attitude about things. Blending families brings chaos and his ability to keep his cool through some of those inevitable circumstances has won him major brownie points, time and time again.

The Gift of Presence

One thing about relationships - (and I am still learning about how to make them work, let me tell you) - I have learned of late, is the chill time.  This is time when Mr. M. and I can just sit down together, watch a news show and comment to each other or blow it into a full intense discussion about what's going on in the world; or just sit and enjoy a documentary on the Discovery Channel about ocean life where we don't talk; but every once in a while steal a glance at each other and smile.  These are times when we are relaxing with nothing on the agenda regarding kiddos, work, or other projects around either house and we can just enjoy each other's presence.

So there you have it.... we have been dating (OR as Mr. M. corrects me... "in a relationship") for six months now and I think for me that is a record.  I hadn't even dated my X four consecutive months before we were engaged... but that is another story for another day.

Nicknames

Now that Mr. M. and I are getting serious... he does, sometimes, called me little nicknames. like: "s.p." which stands for 'shopping partner' or candy.

But the other night, it was a game night before vacation and my kids, Mr. M., and I were playing Pictionary.    We all love games and I have been told I am a little on the competitive side... ok... maybe.... just a little.

In the game, Kass was my partner and Jas and Mr. M. were on a team.  Mr. M. and Jas continued to beat us... beat us bad; and I was having a hard time guessing from Kass' drawings... and we needed some more points.  One time I told her she could have drawn this or that... instead.... in an effort to help her see the word in a different way.... to be helpful of course for next time.  She said something in response... and ended it with, "hon"; to which I said (smiling)... "No you didn't... just call me 'hon.'"  Then Mr. M. chimed in.... "More like 'Attila the Hun.'"

Great... so now I guess this is just another nickname... more of our 'sweet nothings' to remember.

Find yourself... (as Attila the Hun) keeping it real.

Technorati Tags: relationships,single moms dating,anniversaries,games,nicknames

Moms Agree: We Need Me-Time

Moms out there, whether you are married moms or single moms... we all need a little (or in some cases a lot) of me-time.   Taking some time out for yourself will help you in the long run to deal with the constant chaos with the kiddos and demands that seem to stack up on moms' agendas (even when you are trying to say no more often).  When I read a blog post this morning from Ms.Single Mama about learning to chill I found this momversation video.  These moms agree!

I couldn't help but laugh when they talk about sleep being a part of their me-time.  So many times Mr. M. teases me with the line.... "You know I love my sleep," referencing my blog post he read about one of my 'hobbies'.  Check out these ideas from moms like us who do what they can - to steal some me-time.

Find yourself... keeping it real.

Technorati Tags: single moms,moms,me-time,sleep,destressing,chill out

Brace Yourself

Well I should have been bracing myself when I went to the orthodontist yesterday.   I thought I was prepared.... this was our third visit for Kass and I knew she needed a spacer for her crossbite; but was shocked when they told me not only are they going to start out her process with a spacer for enlarging her upper pallet but also - at the same time - put braces on her upper teeth!

I was expecting the spacer but not the braces so soon.  So now we are set up for five back to back weekly appointments in September and October for her to have them put on and adjusted.  The journey of braces begins and Kass is only TEN YEARS OLD!

When I asked Mr. Ortho's assistant about Kass still having baby teeth, she said that would not be a problem and that when preparing the braces they are not connected to baby teeth, in case they fall out while Kass is wearing them.  ...Umm... is this normal?

I am still digesting all this NEW information, since I was expecting her to be 6 months or more in a spacer before I would even be discussing her getting braces.  But I have her appointments set and a payment plan in place regardless.  No pressure or anything....Mr. Ortho.

Hopefully I can trust this orthodontist.  I mean he has about six Mac computers in the waiting room, video games in a separate area and TV's on the wall, so at least we know he has money to spend, eh?  Don't get me wrong, I like him and he has several patients the same age as Kass so I want to think that she is in good hands.... but other than getting him as a referral from her regular dentist, he is a stranger.  A stranger taking care of my baby... makes me a little crazy sometimes.  I can feel my overly analytical anal protective mother syndrome kicking into high gear as I deal with all this info. 

It's not even about the money.  Ok, maybe a little about the money.  It's over five grand and I was expecting that... but now I find online at least one other mother in the same predicament who finally found a reputable orthodontist that quoted just under four grand... Only she lives in Utah.

I think I need a second opinion. Or am I crazy?

Well I tell you this much.  She is scheduled with Mr. Ortho #1 for September and I am moving forward in faith but also praying God will allow me to discern that this is the right timeline and that he is the right orthodontist to do the job.  I just might need a different Mr. Ortho. to convince me we are all on the same page here. It's a lot of money and I don't want her to end up having to do this again years later because we had her braces put on too soon.

So any advice?  This is my first time dealing with the orthodontist... so advice is welcome.

Find yourself... keeping it real. 

Technorati Tags: braces,children,orthodontists

With Six You Get Eggroll

With Six You Get Eggroll

Remember this old movie?  Well I feel sometimes... Mr. M. and I are acting it out.  We feel a little "drama" when everybody gets together especially when we went on vacation and we were around each other for a whole week.  Trying to get SIX to agree on what we were going to do or what we were going to have for dinner can turn out to be quite the saga, let me tell you.

But you know, looking back and reminiscing about the week, we had a great time and seriously, it went well.  The kids sincerely get along great considering their ages do gap a few years....I have been impressed.  We have our moments, but who doesn't really in the grand scheme of things.

Trying to bring two families together with children involved is complicated, no matter how you slice it.  Just look at Doris Day and Brian Keith in that old comedy.  Putting all those personalities into one place can only lead to occasional chaos and insanity.  And we do feel it at times.

Considering all these expectations, the trip turned out to be a success.  Everyone had a great time (at least I think they did, unless they are really pulling one over on me) and they've been sharing their own stories about the time we spent together.  We might have had different fav spots; and many times didn't exactly get everybody to agree on "What's for dinner"; but then again, we have that issue even with just three in the house at times.  (Truth be told, Mr. M. and I don't always agree on what to eat when it's just us!)

So what's your opinion of merging families? 

Do you have any advice for two single parents, dating and hanging out with "all the kids?" 

So far so good for us... but I would love some advice from those who have been here, done that, and now have the T-shirt.

P.S. to all my readers:

Don't forget to check out the CONTEST I posted.  Take a minute to read about it and send me your entry.  I can't wait to see your tips... and you might just be the one to win that Wii gaming console and Wii Fit!

P.P.S.

Oh and if you have a minute, take a look at my photo gallery for a few more photos from the vacation... with the whole gang.

Find yourself... keeping it real.

Technorati Tags: vacation,single parents dating,merging families,contests

Win a Wii --‘Keep Mooo-ving’ Contest

Keep Mooo-ving Contest

Well Friday is finally here and I am so excited to be sharing with you a CONTEST for my readers!   It's true, the grand prize winner will receive a Wii gaming console and the Wii Fit game along with $100 worth of product from the sponsor, Shamrock Farms. 

We are in the middle of the summer months, and those of you with kiddos will already know some things that you have tried to do to get the kiddos active, exercising, and constantly on the 'moooove'.  So this contest will be easy.  If you are like me, you not only want to keep the family active, but also healthy in the choices of nutrition and on-the-go hydration. 

Shamrock Farms is the new milk in town with fun varieties and flavors in great-tasting, on-the-go bottles.  You've got to have your dairy!  So Shamrock Farms is sponsoring the "Keep Mooo-ving" Contest which encourages parents to keep their family active and healthy as the weather heats up, and to share their tips for getting their families mooo-ving this summer.

How the Contest Works

1. Share your tips on how you are getting your family to be more active this summer.  Be creative plus include nutritious hydration. You don't even have to be a parent to enter. (But you do have to be 18 years or older.)
2. Your tips can be any length of text up to 500 words.  But less than 50 words is just fine too!
3. Send your tips/entry as part of an email or as an attached txt, rtf, pdf, or M.S. Word document to:  SOLODOTMOM@GMAIL.com
4. Be sure to include your name, postal mailing address, email address, and phone number ON THE LAST PAGE of your entry for notification purposes in case you are the winner.  This information will not be shared with anyone other than the sponsor and for notification purposes only.
5. Upon submission of your entry to my email address, you are verifying that you have read and understand the CONTEST RULES, which are linked here.  Please take a moment to open the link and read the rules.
6. All entries must be received by July 31, 2009 at 11:59 PM.
7. The winner's entry may be used as a blog post on SOLO dot MOM.

Now What?

So what are you waiting for?  Get typing up your tips for getting the family more active in the summer months and send it to my email.  You just might be the winner of a brand new Wii gaming console and Wii Fit game. 

I'm waiting.....

Find yourself... keeping it real.

Technorati Tags: contests,free Wii,Wii Game,Wii Fit,healthy,active,summer

Find yourself... keeping it real.

Parental Discretion Advised

Ok, ummmm......... not sure I even have words for this art....  

This is one of the pieces of artwork we saw in a great family oriented attraction in Pigeon Forge.  No, I'm not kidding.

Find yourself... keeping it real.

What Am I Thinking?

Mr. M. snapped off this photo when he was supposed to be taking pictures of the boys climbing the indoor rock wall.  I was taking a five minute break, off my feet and lost in thought at the Pit Stop Grill.

This should be one of those photographs where I let all of you suggest captions.

Go ahead, what should be the caption? ...leave it in comments... but be nice.

Find yourself... keeping it real.

Technorati Tags: photography,fun,just me

Jas

Jas

Here is my firstborn, my eldest son, my only son, my teenage source of stress at times, and the reason I think I am getting a bald spot on the back of my head.

I love him more than I can express, but he hates to have me take his picture... and you know how I am about my camera!

So it goes without saying.... I love this photo of him... hanging out at the pool while we stayed at the resort last week. (He didn't even know I was taking his pic here.)  He enjoyed being there... even though you can't see it on his face.

Oh and as promised, I will be giving you all the details by Friday of this week about the contest for the Free Wii Gaming System and more.  So don't forget to check back on Friday....

Oh and to all my relatives out there that read my blog... I don't mind if you enter the contest with your tips and advice but.....you... can't... win.  It's part of the rules that no relatives of mine can win the contest held on my blogsite.  Bummer, I know.  But hey - you get a prize too.... being related to me!  Just kidding....

Find yourself... keeping it real.

Technorati Tags: vacation,pool,sons,teenage years

Close Encounters of the Sea Kind

She went from this level of gear in the pool at the resort.......

to this.....

Naaaaah.... just kidding.

Here Kass is just posing at Ripley's Aquarium and giving Jas the high five.  The aquarium is one of our fav attractions in Gatlinburg.  It is a top notch facility, definitely worth the money, and always has impressive presentations of ocean life.  I actually recommend the combo package deal you can get with several of the Ripley's attractions in the area.  You will easily spend hours here and your children of all ages will enjoy the many exhibits - I promise!

A few more photos taken by me at the Aquarium in Gatlinburg:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Oh and don't forget about checking back for more details on the contest.  I previewed the contest rules last night and I know my readers are going to be excited to be a part of it.  In order to participate, take down my email address:  solodotmom@gmail.com and await further instruction later this week.  You won't be sorry...

Find yourself... keeping it real.

Technorati Tags: oceanic,photography,sea life,vacation,children,contests

So Much To Share and So Little Time + a CONTEST

I just got back from vacation... where we were totally unplugged.  Not only did my laptop end up with a glitch and I couldn't get the Internet to work from the wireless connection at the resort... but I also intentionally kept the cell phone turned off all week.  So I think that was the most time I have been unplugged for quite awhile.  But really... we didn't mind it.  We did so much and made so many memories, it was worth truly getting away from "the rest of the world" for a week.

But on the flip side, now that I am back, I am totally overloaded with things I want to share with all of you.  I am torn between reflection of the vacation itself and tons of photographs I want to post as well as life lessons that seemed to surface.  PLUS I even had a company to contact me prior to vacation with a request to run a contest on my site with a grand prize of $100 worth of their product as well as a Wii gaming console and the Wii Fit game!

So stay tuned this week for vacation highlights and more details on the contest rules and how to enter.  You don't want to miss this chance to win a Wii and Wii Fit, do you?!

So keep checking back, more information is coming soon!

Find yourself... keeping it real.

Photo Credit: http://www.stockxpert.com/browse_image/view/2744341/?ref=sxc_hu

Technorati Tags: contests,vacation,Wii Game,photograhs,unplugged

 

Sharing a Bed

Well I am getting ready for that vacation I was telling you about.  Since I will be leaving in a few days I may not get to post as often on my blog.  So I wanted to leave you with two things.

1.  Take a minute and read this post about second chances and going through divorce and share some thoughts in the comments section.  You know I love your feedback, and any advice is welcome here.

2.  Check out this photo we found when I attended a recent family reunion on my dad's side of the family.  There were lots of photos we went through that belonged to my aunt who passed away last year.  Here you see my sister and I at about the age of 2 and 3 when we used to share a bed together.  Not only did we share a room for all of our growing up years... but for a while we had to sleep in the same bed.  Let me just say, we get along much better now that we don't have to share a bed or a bedroom!

Find yourself... keeping it real.

Technorati Tags: photography,old photos,growing up years

Fruit2day - Nutrition on the GO

Just recently I was able to try... Fruit2day and what a convenient and nutritious little snack... plus tasty too.  My fav is definitely the Mango Peach. 

If you follow my blog, you know I like to eat healthy.  It can be annoying to the kiddos sometimes, but yes, I do buy wheat burger buns and all-grain cheese crackers.  Remember though, I think our bodies will thank us when we get older!

So that takes care of the grain intake, but what about the other food groups like fruit?  Do you get enough fruit in your diet each day? With our busy lives it can be tough to get it all  consumed daily like we need it.  And now I have found this great way to take care of that problem without the messy, sloppy fruit in plastic containers that I try to buy and put in storage containers for a week at a time.  Not only are these fruit snacks convenient in their on-the-go packaging - but they are indeed very tasty.  And my kids like them too!  So we are batting a thousand with these little Fruit2day drinks.  First of all they are 100% natural, full of vitamins and made of 100% juice with no added sugar.  Second, they are not just another fruit drink, these actually have bite size chunks of fruit inside the juice!  They remind me of those cup-of-soup drinks where you get the goodness of a bowl of soup but consume it as a drink.... same concept here with Fruit2day.  These fruit drinks are more like a snack - a healthy snack all-in-one. 

You have to try them!  And if you leave me a comment with your reason for wanting to try these tasty fruit snack drinks, I will place your name and contact info in my little drawing for a coupon from the manufacturer for a FREE 2-pack of Fruit2day. 

Find yourself... keeping it real.

Technorati Tags: fruit,nutrition,healthy,single,onthego lifestyle,reviews