Spring will come

#ice

A photo posted by Katherine (@norakatclark) on Feb 16, 2016 at 6:23am PST

It may not seem like it today..... but Spring is coming.  It will come.  It may not come when we want it or just like we want it, but it will come.  Just like it did in 2015 and in all the years before that.

Spring is coming.

Have a little faith.

I'm looking forward to it.

Holding my breath. Expecting it... the freshness of it.  I need the newness of it.

How to Get Better Sleep

Sleep is so very important. Our bodies renew and rejuvenate overnight and they were created to do that through sleeping and that include deep sleep.  Good sleep patterns will improve not only your mood, but your cognitive abilities during the day, your memory, as well as your health and wellness.

So when you wake up night after night after night at around 3 AM and lay awake for another hour or so before falling back to sleep - that can be frustrating.  Trust me - I know.  Been there, done that way way too many times.

But what can we do to improve our sleep and the longevity of that sleep?

Well I have been doing some research.  Here is a summary of things you can try:

• Establish a bed-time routine. 
• Use this time to meditate and pray - getting all of the day's worries off your mind and into God's hands.  Also thank Him for the good things about that day.  This will remind you of your blessings and release your troubles.
• Make a list for your upcoming day of activities - get all those reminders off your mind and in your phone "listing app" or on paper.
• Include a relaxation playlist of music and be consistent on what time you rest each night. You can start that music as you start your bed-time routine, washing our face, brushing teeth, etc.  Or you can just start the music when you are finally in the bed and ready to wind down and sleep.  Either way can be beneficial.  I do this regularly and it makes a huge difference in getting my mind to calm down from the day's activities. Here is my list: 

• Make your sleeping environment comfortable.
• Reduce clutter in your room.
• Use comfortable sheets and clean them regularly.  I love these super cozy sheets I found that are microfiber and very soft.
• Supplement mineral/vitamin deficiencies.
• Incorporate a higher magnesium intake (since an alarming majority of Americans are deficient in this important mineral) - through supplements or better yet through application to your skin. 
• Here is a recipe for Magnesium Oil you can make at home.
• Take some "sleepy dust" just before dozing off.  Salt and honey combination can assist with your body closing down for the night - here is a recipe for the amounts of sugar and salt to use and how much to take at bed-time.  But I prefer to use raw honey and sea salt.
• Be mindful of the "resting zone."
• Don't use electronics when you awaken in the middle of the night.  Just don't.
• Don't turn on bright lights.
• Don't start back over your list of things to do - if they come to mind - write them down and then forget them.  But try to do this before dozing the first time.

Some of these ideas were found in articles by nutritionist bloggers like Dr. Axe and Wellness Mama. They are the most prominent ideas/tips I have found and I am incorporating them into my personal routine to get into a more consistent and more continuous sleep pattern. 

Let me know what you have found to be helpful in getting a "good night's sleep."

Leave your comments below.

*Disclosure regarding discounted products received in part as a review.

Each Day, Each Decision, Each Defining Moment

I'm so proud of my kiddos, my treasures.  They make me crazy at times. I don't need to go there, but they are also making me quite proud.

Jas is off to college and seems to be settling in.  He's been home only once and I like that he is getting a feel for being on his own and doing things on his own - even though I know he is hanging with his friends and even staying over in their dorm - instead of his own suite.... but that's a story for another day about his room mate.  At the very least he is developing a routine and getting into the groove of the work expected of him; and so far I haven't gotten any sobbing phone calls in the middle of the night - begging to come home for good. (knock on wood)

Kass has started high school and is really doing well.  We moved, which placed her in a different high school from her brother - actually the one she wanted to attend - and she loves it.  She is so grown up that it is even shocking sometimes to me.  We hang out in the evenings during the week, make dinner together and work on some chore at the house.  I love this time we get to bond, making memories, just the two of us.

Then there are my other kiddos that aren't here as often: Chad's three that we try to see as much as we can (like the camping trip last weekend with 4 of our 5 kiddos):

Tori is driving already!  She is also doing well this year and looking forward to getting her license sooner than I like to think about, lol.  She seems to be enjoying her second year of high school and the social life it brings.

Rach is finishing up her last year of middle school and has outdone herself with her latest accomplishment with violin.  She is first row 2nd chair - what a high honor!  We are very proud of the fact she is excelling and putting her energy into something she loves, her talent with music.  (And Rach- I hope i have your chair listing correct!)

And then there's Drew.  Little rambunctious Drew that loves his electronics and his books.  So smart he amazes us all as he sails above the rest of his classmates in most of his subjects.

I pray for them daily and my hope is that they will continue to remember and acknowledge that each day, each decision, each defining moment leads them to the bigger picture that results from the choices they make.  I want the best for them but more than that - more than even I can imagine for them - I want God's best for them.  I pray they will also strive for what God has for their futures - His best.

Find yourself, keeping it real...

Kat

My DOTMOM Eyes

 

I am trying out a new site to post about my day-to-day joys along this journey as a single mom, a position/status that will be changing in the near future.

Don't worry, I will still be posting at this site (SOLO dot MOM) but also hope you will check out the new tumbler - at http://dotmom.tumblr.com titled: "My DOTMOM Eyes" and check out the latest happenings in my world.

Let me know what you think....

Share a comment below or share a comment at the new site: My DOT MOM Eyes.

Find yourself... keeping it real.
SOLO dot MOM

One boyfriend, one curfew, one text message at a time

While the debate is on in the background, I wanted to sit down and finally f.i.n.a.l.l.y. write another blog.  I have so much to share with my readers, but I will spare you the boring and only share the highlights.

The kiddos

Jas and Kass, the kiddos… I now refer to them in public as “the bigguns.”  They are growing up so fast I can’t keep up; and I am with them every day. (Well almost every day. But I digress <= already!)

Kass has a boyfriend. Seriously you don’t want me to get started on that point.  Trust me when I say, I am just going to leave it at that. And yes, she now has the “worst mother ever” because of the guidelines I have instructed about me being “in-the-know” regarding their conversations and “text messages.” (Can I just skip this part of her life and do a fast forward?!) Sadly if I did – she would be out of college and married after that blink.  Let the roller coaster ride begin, then.

Jas went to his homecoming dance. (Yes, can you believe a formal dance!) And he dressed for it: I have pictures to prove it. He is talking more and more about college plans, taking PSAT tests and I am still reminding him he needs to start applying for those ever lovely scholarships.  Can you believe I will be getting his senior portraits done in just 8 months?! Yeah, I need to stop before I hyperventilate.

The House/Move

Not sure if and/or when we will be moving/selling the house.  That seems to be in an “on hold” mode right now.  But with recent home improvement projects and “other” improvements on the list, we are still enjoying the process of making this one just like we want it.  My kiddos love living here.

Goals

I have been working on creating my goals for the next 5 years and trying to simplify exactly what that means from finances to my children’s spiritual growth.  One thing I do realize more and more each day is this parenting thing is tough.  Don’t let anyone tell you that it’s easy (even with two parents partnering together in one house). It gets tougher as they mature into these ‘tweens’ and teens; and sometimes I have to step back and ask God, “Can I do this?” Then I am reminded, “I can do all things, through Christ…” even when I feel like pulling my hair out.

Interjection here… I am watching the debate and it’s almost comical as they deliberate about “apples and oranges” for this 9-9-9 plan on the taxes.  That is all.

But in the meantime…day by day…

As I prepare for those goals and discuss my kiddos’ (the bigguns’) futures with them, we continue pressing on each day-- one at a time: one hairdo, one curfew, one text message, one XBox match, one girl scout session, one church service, one grade, one boyfriend, at-a-time.

Technorati Tags: teens,tweens,family time,college,scholarships,parenting,personal development,Faith,persistence

The Final Summit

After reading The Final Summit, I was intrigued.  Not only were facts from history included that I had never heard revealed but I also enjoyed the concept of having so many great men (and women) in the same room passionately solving the greatest problem of humanity.

Andy Andrews puts life into perspective and brings history to life similar to his recent book, The Butterfly Effect.  In my younger years, I never enjoyed reading history books or history classes; but this book, full of facts and quotes, would have brought even me out of a fog of boredom when reading the relevance of each historical character and their contribution to our current day’s prosperity.

My favorite historical reference was the life of Eric Erickson.  What boldness and humbleness it must have taken, ironically combined, for someone to live with each moment being a new risk like he did, along with his wife.  All this Eric did for the sake of saving his homeland; and ultimately his sacrifice affected the success of the biggest war in history.His life story is spelled out in the book from Andrews’ own research. 

I give the book high marks and recommend it.  The overall purpose of the book as well the intriguing research make this worthy of your time. 

When you find nothing but desperate hopelessness around you, when all seems to be adding up to constant opposition, what should you do?  Read the book and find out.

 

 

Technorati Tags: The Final Summit,Andy Andrews,Life lessons,history,personal development

Making the Most of Easter and Other Holidays Alone

Spring has sprung and Easter arrived to celebrate new life, and for Christians – the new life you received  when you accepted the very Easter story. His story in history is what gives us joy unspeakable. 

I celebrated the day without the kiddos (it was their dad’s weekend, you know). Following a morning of worship celebration at church, I went with friends to a dynamic 2 hour drama of the Resurrection of Christ in Radford that night. The day was full and the focus was obvious. 

It is tough when you have to celebrate some of the holidays without your children being there. I know.  I get it. But making the most of your holiday, even when you are alone, is where you have to focus your time, your energy, and your planning. 

It can be so easy to let yourself get caught up in the gloomy, oh-my-life-stinks mode.  But how much more enjoyable it could be if you would just refute that mode and with intentionality make the choice to fill your day with friends and things you enjoy.

1. Plan a special time to celebrate with the children on a different day than the holiday falls, if they will be “visiting” on the holiday itself.
2. Make the tradition and fun be about the holiday season – not just the specific day.  Spread out the celebrating so it falls on more than one day during the season.
3. In advance, contact friends and make plans for the day when the children will be away.  Plan a meal with friends or family, an outing, or plan to join them in their family time.
4. Make a list of things you don’t get to do when busy with the children.  Have it available to pull out when you feel the “blahs” of your me-time. Here’s my list for me-time I put together three years ago.

These are just a few simple ideas to keep yourself from focusing on the negative when you have time on your hands without the children, especially during a holiday.

It’s normal to think about them, wishing they were near.  But just think, when they are off to college and doing their own thing on holidays throughout the year, you will be this much more prepared for it.

For some of us, those college days are closer than we like to think about.

Technorati Tags: Easter story,Easter Holiday,holidays,me-time management,single mom,single mother,unspeakable joy,Christ,Christians,Resurrection,holidays without children,lonely,Easter,planning,lists,family time

Photo Credit: Katherine Shinault

Soul Surfer while I wait…

While I sit waiting on Kassity to finish with her Orthodontist appointment… and waiting, at least they have Wi-Fi available. 

Surfing the web and going through my emails, I found the release on this upcoming movie this weekend.  Soul Surfer: This is one I do want to see.  Have you seen the previews?  A girl who suffers from an accident that results in amputation, finds her true purpose and passion in life while supported by her family and her faith.

The storyline is excellent and I look forward to sharing this one with the kiddos (well at least Kass).

Here are some fan’s testimonials below and some clips from the film.

Enjoy!

 

 

Technorati Tags: Soul Surfer,tweens,family time,family movies,family entertainment,faith,personal development,Life Lessons

You're a Firework!

Kass, YOU.are.A.FIREWORK, baby girl.

I love this song... we listened
to it on the way home this evening after I took Kass and a "bunch" of her BFF's to the park.  Time is flying by and I can’t believe how much she is growing up before my eyes.  Where is my baby?

Here's one of the pics from the park late today... and here are the lyrics to the Fireworks song by Katy Perry along with more pics from the evening at the park:

Do you ever feel like a plastic bag

Drifting through the wind

Wanting to start again

Do you ever feel, feel so paper thin

Like a house of cards

One blow from caving in

Do you ever feel already buried deep

Six feet under scream

But no one seems to hear a thing

Do you know that there's still a chance for you

Cause there's a spark in you

You just gotta ignite the light

And let it shine

Just own the night

Like the Fourth of July

Cause baby you're a firework

Come on show 'em what you're worth

Make 'em go "Oh, oh, oh!"

As you shoot across the sky-y-y

Baby you're a firework

Come on let your colors burst

Make 'em go "Oh, oh,oh!"

You're gunna leave 'em fallin' down-own-own

You don't have to feel like a waste of space

You're original, cannot be replaced

If you only knew what the future holds

After a hurricane comes a rainbow

Maybe you're reason why all the doors are closed

So you could open one that leads you to the perfect road...

More pictures from the evening at the park…..

 

Technorati Tags: Katy Perry,Fireworks,parks,Roanoke Valley Parks,tween,friends,nature,swings,photography,photos,pictures

Single Parents Everywhere…and Others

Single parents must catch Terry Hitchcock’s story, told in MY RUN, in theatres 3.31. He proves that we are all heroes.  But it’s for more than single parents…

When I watched this trailer it moved me.  Not just because of women I have known that have battled breast cancer, and not just because a dear woman of 48 years passed away this week from her own battle with cancer, and not just because we all have our own struggles in life, but because of a combination of these things:  I want to do my part of being “someone’s hero.”

Here’s some info from the press release:

We’re all running a marathon one way or another. Whether it is staying afloat as a single, working parent, battling a disease or trying to conquer a fear, it all involves a fight. Join us for an unforgettable inspirational story about a 57-year-old man who ran 75 consecutive marathons in 75 consecutive days. The award-winning and critically acclaimed documentary MY RUN is coming to movie theaters nationwide for an exclusive one night premiere event on Thursday, March 31st at 7:00pm (Local Time).
Terry Hitchcock battles the grief of losing his wife to breast cancer by setting out on a journey to bring awareness and a voice to the struggles faced by single parent families and their children. Narrated by Academy Award winner Billy Bob Thornton, this powerful and uplifting documentary exemplifies a commitment to something greater than yourself and achieving something deemed impossible.
Following the feature, audiences will take a deeper look into the story through interviews with the star Terry Hitchcock and his son, support team member Chris Hitchcock.
A portion of proceeds from the MY RUN Premiere event will benefit the Livestrong Foundation.

Watch the trailer below:

 

Technorati Tags: single parents,breast cancer awareness,single moms,single dads,movies,My Run,Terry Hitchcock

In The Moment

Remember this famous quote:

Tyrone, you know how much I love watching you work, but I've got my country's 500th anniversary to plan, my wedding to arrange, my wife to murder and Guilder to frame for it; I'm swamped.

The Princess Bride

I’m so busy anymore I don’t know what to blog, or when. I love this quote from this classic movie. My own statement about blogging would be close:

Blog, you know how much I love sharing with you and the world wide web, but I’ve got my office’s 100th anniversary to plan, my kids to take to the doctor (four times a month lately), a boyfriend to cater to, my house to get on the market, and I need to find a way to pay for all of it; I’m swamped. (j/k Mr. M!)

I took off the month of January, for the most part, from my blog, to get focused. I participated in a 21 day fast that I would love to share more about soon. But in that time – I did get focused and found my priorities again. 

My priorities are my faith and my children at the top. (Even though my children at times try my patience, thereby my faith… but I digress.) My relationship with Mr. M follows in that sequence and we are looking toward our future. But I didn’t find any extra time lying around to squeeze all the “stuff” into.Sometimes I have so many plates spinning between my children, their “stuff;” my home, its ‘stuff;’ Mr. M, his ‘stuff;’ my job, and its stuff that I lose my focus on what’s important. Life is spinning crazy by all of us.

So with that thought I want to say:

Take time to be in the moment where you are right now. Appreciate all the little things in your world and pay attention to whatever it is you might be doing – while you are doing it. Whether it’s doing the laundry or making jewelry with your daughter – give it your full attention and be in that moment. Once it is gone – it’s gone and is only a memory of what we make it.

Find yourself…keeping it real.

Technorati Tags: life lessons,relationships,gratitude,appreciation,time management,parenting

Snow time like the present

As I sit on the sofa, curled up in a blanket with my laptop on me and Kass plays with her Lego city she is making on the loveseat, I look out the window at the snow.  It’s our first snow day. The office was closed and of course the schools were as well.  Ice covers our street and snow lays a few inches thick over everything.

We have been so hectic crazy busy lately that I haven’t blogged in eons, it seems.  Not really.  A few pics here and there, but that is all I have been able to post.  Finally with a snow day bringing some time to spare, what do I dare say here when it comes to my thoughts, my fears, my personal growth, my future?

It is what it is. 

Life is good, life is hard, life is beautiful.  But sometimes we have to look a little harder to see that beauty; to see through the muck that comes our way.  This includes expenses that pile up to keep a vehicle on the road, or paying higher electric bills for the season.  It’s not easy.  I’m not going to pretend that it is… to keep up with everything.

But here is what I do know. With a little faith, a little hope, and a lot of prayer, it can be done.

And happiness and contentment can be found.  Even taking care of all the “muck” as a single parent, it can be done. With wrapping paper staring at me in one corner and gifts that need to be wrapped in the other, I know it is still possible – to get it all taken care of, even in the midst of the gift giving season.

Laundry may be piling up and I never get a completely empty sink in the kitchen, but the kiddos are fed, playing, talking to me about recent adventures with friends, and enjoying the most up-to-date techno gadgets.  Plus I know where they are, what they are doing, who they are with and overall that they are staying out of trouble. They continue to make me proud. What more can a mom ask for?

What are you grateful for this Christmas?

As a single parent, what are you asking for this Christmas?

How do you define happiness in your present moment?

Share your thoughts in the comments section below.

Find yourself… keeping it real

Technorati Tags: Christmas,happiness,single moms,single parents,life,personal development,contentment,parenting

September’s come and gone

With everything being so busy these last few months, I had not given any thought to my list of monthly missions.  I had to check back to see what the mission was for September…with the month almost gone, I only worked on it during the last week.  It was blogging, writing, and networking. Finally I set aside time at night to work on this area.

But I did get to work on this mission a little.

October, interestingly, is to work on my proficiency with administration, enhance my efficiency at work.

I had been praying for that even before I reflected back on this “mission” from the list.

Now it’s time to put some legs on that prayer, as I focus on organizing my tasks (daily) and facilitating several projects at once in an organized process.  With tips from unexpected sources, I am working on my methods to improve these skills.

I won’t bore you with those details… but at least I am keeping up with my list to some degree.

What have you been focusing on lately? Are you working to improve on something in your life?  Please share your thoughts in the comments section below.

Find yourself… keeping it real

Photo Credit: photoXpress.com, author: kim75

Technorati Tags: calendar,missions,lists,to-do,personal development,writing,blogging,networking,administration,efficiency,proficiency,organized,skills

I love Donald Miller…his blog and his books

If you haven’t read Donald’s blog, I have one word to describe his insight and perspective on Christianity: cool.

So to follow up my recent post referencing my readers to an article that talks about things I chose to filter, I wanted to also share a Christian resource that I enjoy and pull interesting perceptions from… Donald Miller’s blog.

Check him out… here’s a couple quotes from his blog post recently titled: How to Give Your Home and Your Stuff Meaning.

It made me think about how cool it was that my friend, in preparing a ranch for others to be together and to be with God, was imitating the heart of God without, perhaps, even realizing he was doing it…

I’ve discovered a little secret my friend with the ranch must have discovered a long time ago: Managing God’s stuff for the enjoyment and comfort of the people God loves is a blast. It gives meaning to your things, and a feeling of importance to the places you get to live within…

What are the things you’ve done to convert your home into God’s home, a place you get to manage for Him?

Yeah, he’s just cool like that.  Brings the ideas about being a Christian… down home… into the heart of where we live.

Enjoy.

Find yourself… keeping it real.

Without the heartbreak, you’re still making up stories

Are you afraid of falling in love? …of being in love, deeply in love?

Are you afraid of being alone?

Is there a difference between fear of being alone and fear of being lonely?

We all want love. That is a common goal.  Yet we all fear losing that same love: our common fear.

These are just a few of the concepts covered by Susan Piver in just one of the articles in this month’s issue of fear.less.

I have been a subscriber since it began in May or June and though I do not believe in every ideology it expresses: I filter when I read (and I have enough confidence in my own faith and beliefs that I am comfortable reading materials that reference other faiths at times) so I have gleaned from the issues and especially liked this article about trust, fear, and relationships.

Buddhism references aside, interesting stuff…

Plus I love the layout of the design – and I want to learn how they do that with their pdf’s!

Check out this magazine (ezine): fear.less… if you dare.

Pssst. this is not a sponsored post.

 Find yourself… keeping it real.

 

What to Expect When You’re Divorced- My Upcoming Book

There’s much I want to blog about.  And much that I cannot blog about.  This post may be saying too much, but I have had enough. 

My X has found my blog; it’s no big deal because I have nothing to hide about single parenting or dating which I share with my readers, here.  My relationship with Mr. M is public knowledge.  But sadly, my X has continually shared his negative opinion to my kiddos about me having a new relationship.  These are ugly irrational things that my kiddos don’t need to hear. Nor do they need the mental duress from dealing with his rants about his rejection of my new relationship.  He tells them what he will do if I get married again. And it’s not pretty.

How do you recommend dealing with an X who has not moved on… five years after the final D?  I plan to investigate my options, especially when the mental abuse is being subjected to the kiddos when they are with him.

Transparency isn’t always pretty when you are living a life as a single mom and your X insists upon being uncooperative with the co-parenting concept.  I understand everyone has their own opinion about remarriage after divorce, but I don’t believe imposing personal dogmatic convictions upon someone else is appropriate behavior.  Nor do I think you should make your own children feel bad about their other parent moving on in her life, whether you agree with that other parent’s choices or not.  If the other parent’s choices are moral, legal and not bringing harm to the child nor placing a child in an unsafe, unstable environment, then you should keep your opinions to yourself. (IMHO)

Longsuffering in this case, however, has been long used up by this single mom.  Now I have to take next steps to ensure my children do not needlessly endure unnecessary stresses from their father.  Hopefully he will realize the harm it is doing to them not me, in the process and just finally move on and let it go.

We can only hope and pray he chooses that route before other actions have to be taken.

Did you read that, Mr. X?

Find yourself… keeping it real.

Photo Credit: Created image using the background of a well known parenting book and adding my own text, title.

Technorati Tags: Divorce,relationships,personal development,co-parenting,coparenting,ex-husband,ex-wife,marriage,remarriage,convictions,mental abuse

My new favorite

I took about a dozen photographs of this gorgeous butterfly last weekend.  I had a hard time choosing a favorite.  There were a few great shots IMHO.  But this one is my current fave.

Later this week when I was reading a book I am currently using for personal devotions, I read this passage and it made me think of this beauty as well as reflect for a few moments:

…If we look closely at the workings of creation, we find that God nearly always works through process.  Think of it.  First there is a seed, then a sprout, then a blossom, and finally fruit.  God does not begin with a butterfly, but with a larva that becomes a chrysalis and finally a creature with wings.  Neither does God speak a star into existence, but sends dust floating into space, then interstellar gas that slowly heats up, and eons later a star is formed.  Perhaps most mysterious of all is the unfolding process of ovum, fetus, baby, child, adolescent, adult.  The universe is designed to move stage by stage, from incompletion to completion.  Now why should we suppose that God has designed the heart any differently than the rest of creation?… (pp. 69-70, Firstlight, The Early Inspirational Writings of Sue Monk Kidd)

The heart goes through stages just like the butterfly.  It is a process, it takes time.  I’m currently trying to be more aware of the stage of my heart.

Where is your heart? What stage or level in the process of becoming… more compassionate, more aware, more tender?

Share your thoughts in the comments below.

Find yourself… keeping it real.

Photo Credit:  Katherine Shinault, SOLO dot MOM (http://kitkat4real.blogspot.com)

Technorati Tags: relationships,personal development,photography,photos,nature,butterflies,butterfly,metamorphosis,devotions,God's love,God's creation

Walk Like You Have Somewhere to Go

In reality, my unhappiness wasn’t Phil’s fault or anyone else’s. 

As women, we often look to our men to be the knights in shining armor who will make everything right. 

We expect them to be the ones to validate us and make us feel worthy. 

Trust me when I say, the men in our lives can’t do that. 

More often than not, they are fighting the same insecurities and demons we are. 

It would take me years to realize that I was the only one responsible for my happiness and that blaming others only shifted the focus away from where it needed to be – on me.

Quote above from pages: 125-126 (Walk Like You Have Somewhere to Go).

The mother of Shaquille O’Neal, Lucille O’Neal shares her life story in this book, Walk Like You Have Somewhere to Go.  She struggles through a difficult childhood and shares about her life when she becomes pregnant as a teen and the ramifications when she starts her journey as a single mom.  Her path may have been full of difficult moments but in her later years she gives credit to God for guiding her journey to a place where she finds answers to questions many of us share right along side her.

Later on page 177, she writes:

I never saw the possibility of changing my life while struggling to figure out how to feed a family of six with one chicken.  But that is the true beauty of God’s plan for us.  We may not know what His plans hold for us, but we must trust that they are bigger and better than anything we could ever imaging for ourselves. “With God all things are possible.” – Matt. 19:26 (NKJV)

To read these words from someone who now has everything available to her at her fingertips – is impressive.  One of my favorite stories she shares is after Shaq has acquired his wealth and she has his “driver” in his limo take her to Kmart to buy furnishings for Shaq’s new house.  But that one, you have to read for yourself.

Each single mom may have a different story about how we came to this role in life; whether through a divorce like me or like Lucille O’Neal who was thrown into adulthood quickly as a teenage mom.  But each of our stories can become a better story if we know where to turn to find the answers.  Lucille realized this.

Find yourself… keeping it real.

This review was made possible by Thomas Nelson Publishing.  The book listed above was received to read for possible review.

Technorati Tags: Walk Like You Have Somewhere to Go,Thomas Nelson,relationships,self-esteem,personal development,Faith,teenagers,single moms,teen pregnancy

Me-Time for a massage

Me-Time is in abundance this week.  I have already started a list of things I want to do while I await my kiddos return from their summer break with their dad.  Mr. M just left this morning with his sons for a week long visit to see family in Maryland, so the me-time just multiplied. 

As a single mom, one of the things I had to conquer from the very beginning was how I would use the time I had alone when the kiddos were at their dad’s house.  In the early stages with no ‘relationship’ of interest I found myself lonely instead of utilizing that time to pursue interests that had been buried during my past.

Now all these years later I manage this time as a source of productivity. This week, I have a list of small projects I may (or may not) get done during my free time/me-time as well as some overdue pampering.  Reading and writing is definitely ranked high as well as some touch-up painting needed on baseboards after the floors were refinished.

Mid-week I have a special treat planned: an appointment for my first ever therapeutic massage after work.  Thanks to my best friend, TB for a gift card to a nearby day spa, I get to have this treat.  (The gift card should have been used months ago, since I got it for Christmas. Finally I have the me-time to do so.)

What are some extra-special things you like to do during your me-time?

Share your thoughts in the comments section below.

Find yourself…keeping it real.

Photo Credit: SXC.hu \ Kikashi

Technorati Tags: massage,me-time,pampering,home improvement,spa,therapeutic,gifts,single moms,lonely,time management

Dating and Baggage – Drawing the line

If you like reading my post below, check out other posts about my own personal dating experience before I met Mr. M.  A few posts about dating:

• Dating 101 - Part 1
• Dating 101 - Part 2
• Dating 101 - Part 3
• Dating 101 - Part 4
• Dating 101 - Part 5
• These continue in the bottom section of the right side bar on the blogsite.

A good friend of mine is using www.EHarmony.com as well as www.match.com because he is back in the dating scene.  We’ve been good friends for several years so he was sharing with me about some recent experiences amongst the women he has met and went out with.  He is in his thirties and most of his dates have also been in their thirties.  Most.

Baggage and Dating

Everyone has their share of baggage when you are dating at our age.  But when you are meeting others, where do you draw the line and say that’s just too much baggage?   When do you accept it as part of the  process… because you know you bring your own to the table as well?

If they share things about their past that they have put behind them and are determined they are going to make things different in their lives, do you disregard it?  Do you pretend all that ‘past’ doesn’t matter? 

What if that “past” was activity that went on for years and years?

These are valid questions, he has recently had to answer. 

I would have to ask many questions:  When did the past begin?  How long ago did you start making things different in your life?  Has your commitment to a better lifestyle been working?  Some things would add up to just “too much” baggage, in my opinion; but what do you think?

Share your thoughts in the comments section below.

Find yourself… keeping it real

Technorati Tags: dating,dating websites,match.com,single moms,single,romance,relationships

Photo Credit:  PhotoXpress.com / Andrey Kiselev (1066314)